It seems too often that humans are hard wired to obsess over failures for a greater length of time than they celebrate their successes. All of us have emotions we hold onto that prevent us from being the best versions of ourselves.
When we do not deal with negative emotions such as anger, fear, or anxiety right away, they can, and will resurface as negative outcomes in life. Harboring negative feelings leads to both impairments in occupational and social functioning. If you do not know how to deal with these negative emotions, you are more likely to blame yourself and believe “it’s all my fault.” This sort of thinking diminishes emotional, physical, and spiritual energy until you cannot function effectively. You eventually can become exhausted, paralyzed, and even depressed.
Much of the adversity that individuals experience is the result of being stuck in a specific self-defeating mindset. It’s mind over matter when it comes to getting out of a rut or when trying to overcome a setback. When we release ourselves from the vicious cycle of a negative mindset, we are free to perform up to optimal levels. We can do anything we set our minds to. Our minds and bodies can work synergistically.
It may not be easy to deal with negative emotions, but learning to manage them is vital to our well-being. It is necessary for us to learn how to release these negative emotions regardless of whether we’ve been holding onto them for a few moments or a lifetime.
My message to all those who are holding onto negative emotions is to focus on bigger victories and tougher endeavors that you have accomplished in your past. Your past behavioral successes are the best predictors of future successes. You can learn to control these negative emotions when they occur by taking hold over your negative and sometimes irrational thoughts that precede them. When faced with a setback, using reassuring self-statements as well as supportive evidence recalled from others’ feedback and previous successes are important steps to releasing the hold your negative emotions have over you.
In order to reach an optimal performance zone (like a hitter in baseball), we need to use cognitive tools and positive self statements known as motivational catalysts. We need to “go for the batting title, not the home run crown.” “Don’t aim! Just throw the ball.” How we manage our emotions on average over the life course is more important that one feeble moment. Yet, when we encounter that moment with its negative emotions, we need to …
R: Recognize the negative emotion;
E: Explore its origin;
L: Let the negative emotion go;
E: Engage in activities that relax you;
A: Acknowledge that you have control;
S: Set yourself up for future success;
E: Exercise your power of control.
It is important to acknowledge what is in your control: yourself, your mindset, and your perspective. Invest in your mental health just as much as in your physical health. By learning to navigate the obstacles life throws your way, you will able to live a longer, healthier, and happier life.
To learn more, visit www.draldencass.com or call Dr. Cass directly at 646-202-9611.
DASHA® is a luxury lifestyle brand and New York City-based wellness center created to offer a truly holistic approach to wellness. To learn more, visit dashawellness.com.
