Do you feel like there are some relationships in your life that have room for improvement? Have you asked yourself, “Am I doing everything I can?” There are a few very simple things you can do to instantly up the quality of your relationships:
Schedule a reminder or write a note to yourself about important engagements for the other person. Do you have a friend whose mother is going through cancer treatment? A friend who is nervous about going on a job interview? A work colleague worried about something related to his/her child? Whatever it is, people are human and want to know you care. Schedule a reminder the morning of that job interview or every two weeks while your friend’s mother is undergoing cancer treatment and then reach out with a phone call, email, text or even card or flowers if appropriate. A little extra touch goes a long way in to putting good energy into your relationship and the universe.
Stop taking things personally. Sometimes people say thing they don’t mean or you misinterpret an action or words. Often times this has more to do with what is going on with the other person than what is going on with you. (Hard to believe, but true!) So stand your ground and be honest (passive aggressive is never the way to go), but don’t get angry, hold grudges, retaliate, or drag things out longer than necessary. Pick and choose your battles. Be supportive and allow for human error. When you’re on the other side and doing the battle launching, you’ll appreciate the relationship where the other person supports you and your oversight, miscalculation or misjudgment.
Echo the language you hear and feed it back. People you have relationships with want to know you are really listening. Repeating what they say back to them as part of your own answer or response helps that person feel taken care of and more likely to engage in intelligent and healthy behavior in your interactions. Example: “I know you’re angry and I understand, and I’m feeling ______ because ____, but I’d like to solve this.” Let’s face it, there’s enough drama in the world without creating it in your relationships. Develop your circle of awareness of the world around you to reap the benefits of more satisfying relationships.
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